By Phoenix of Elder Mountain – Milena Sidorova, the spider dancer takes great effort to perfect her dance and it shows, I have watched several of her performances, and although she is more of a dance teacher sharing her choreography with other dancers, her spider self shows great promise. When we use creativity to guide our life, it becomes very blessed, even if its small amounts of creativity, and for those who accept it as a life path, it can bring our life into a higher place by shamanizing our creative life. This way of life, becomes a direct act of understanding our animal nature (instincts of responses without the uses of the mind).
There are three very ancient totems one should be aware of and what they represent: The first is “bird” which represents the “soul”, second is “serpent” which represents the “healing of the soul” and third is “spider” which weaves the two “soul healing” together. These three totems or mythologies are in almost every single spiritual teaching around the earth. They are grandmother medicines and were here long before 3,000 bce. In my life as a shaman, I can use my abilities of my animism souls, when I take others on a shamanic journey to help them. I will shape shift into a bird or animal in “their journey” as a guide to help them to their destination to help find the wound. In this video, she is not a shaman working a medicine healing session, she is a dancer, using her gifts in an artistic way – her own spider nature.
I could tell you all the little meanings of spider but there are ten thousand totem web sites out there to help you, one more is not going to take you a later deeper. I want to take you deeper … When we grow and enter different decades of our life, we may have always had this type of soul to is more expansive than others, but rejected our gift by not believing its real, or maybe the magical part of nature is still dormant for you, or many you had no mirrors to help you express the instinctual nature of you that is extracted from your own soul within and your emotional body.
Awareness is a very subtle thing and takes practices and development beyond books and knowledge. If you really believed, you could call a spider into your room tonight and it will be there. Whether you can see it or not is a whole different thing. Healing, healthy creativity or even a combination of healing creativity expands our awareness so you can see.
Spider and any Totems
The first thing one should do when they wish to understand their natural self, is to learn symbolism, which is not an easy or light task mind you, learning both human or animal symbolism requires work and dedication, such as the spider totem as an example here. The first time spider came to you, when you were young, and it entered your personal space, this is very important, how did you feel? Were you afraid or surprised or delighted? My first time I was 8 years old and new neighbors had moved into the home across the street. Their daughter was a college student studying spider and she had lots of them.
One time she invited me in to teach me about daddy long legs and let them crawl over her arms. I was fascinated and to this day, they are still helpers of mine. All we have to do is pay attention. Our relationship to the natural world can be as deep or shallow as you want it to be and sometimes not all totems or shape shifters come as friendly totems, they come to initiate and that is beyond totems.
What makes spirituality shamanism-animism different than just the love of animals or pets or bugs… I would have to say its a lack of sensitive awareness, a lack of soul education and a path less traveled to heal your own soul (emotional issues). Mind & Body do not bring us into this reality or realm of animistic magic, and drug shamanism just distorts and disrespects it, mind and body have no jurisdiction to this reality, so the distance between our soul and the souled (animal, avian, bug etc) is a veil and the veil is a human one, either its real and tangible or its invisible and does not exist.
Even when you bring your mental body into a serous study of totems, we don’t cross the threshold into mysticism because it may not be our path this lifetime, or it requires too many real risks that you just cannot cross that bridge when it appears. I think the greatest block is fear, and worry about what other people think about a reality they do not believe exists. That is the saddest thing i see in those who want to enter this realm but are swayed by those who could care less, but care enough to devalue it or persuade others not to bother because its “weird’. The only weird thing about it, is the word, in my world its awesome and amazing, and can be somewhat spiritually dangerous.
In spiritual terms, a naturalist taking a hike, who see’s a spider, investigates its movements, habits and actions, and may love spiders, but he moves along in his hike without the messengers’ soul sharing. As a shaman, I would never do this, I would first thank the spider for coming to me as a messenger on my hike, then i would remain empty and watch the spider as she does her dance, telling me the ancient story of how she communicates, I would watch without any thoughts of what it means, leaving my mind out of the scenario.
The spiritual person learns by practicing over and over again what each particular spider who enters their life does, how it moves and does its language in a dance (movements), hawk does it a different way, and all of these have one thing in common, they do not talk to you in a human way, you have to learn their language. in ‘meeting’ terms, just the connection that is, in the middle of the woods, spider who comes as a messenger to me, I know what message she bring. She says you better watch the rest of your hike, you walk on a web, and there are other messengers, some not as nice as me (if she is not a poisonous spider), she also says, you have some webs to clean up around your personal home today also.
After you learn all the different things connected with spiders through each experience you have with them, and this is only learned by trial and error, good guessing and bad guessing and then throwing guessing in the trash. Keeping a journal of your experience would be more productive, rather than all the LISTS of what they mean in web writing and books, you learn about your soul – not spider’s soul. Then as more experiences and years go by, when she appears again, your intuition begins to activate because your mind practiced silence and no attachments, that sounds very buddhist and yes, it is but to the animal world, not the human one, buddhism lives in the realm of the human or divine human. You will then get the animal or spider more and more.
Spiders in all teachings, talk about their weaving abilities, the ancient story of the women weavers opens up another long journey of spiritual work then, understanding the Goddess weaver stories in ancient myths in order to understand one sentence of a totem explanation in a book or web writing. Great if your an actual weaver or embroiderer, it might come more natural to you, but you may not have a spider animism soul, so you still must practice symbolism, and with the help of myths, folktales and stories, or try looking at ancient art and ponder and meditate on them, then the spider totem starts to come alive. Ancient art has only certain animals, and those were the ones who were going to be used or destroyed by rising Sun Cults of men.
Once spider leaves the waking world and then comes in your dreams or any animal or avian you are woking with, then you know you are going deeper from out here in the waking world to the inner dreamer who knows spider well. If you had a lot of spider dreams, then you are not getting the teaching of change out here in your waking world and doing something about it, spider will keep coming in your dream until you change in your waking life. I encouraged you to start reading about spider totem, keeping a totem journey with your dream journal, and the practices and study get easier when spider or hawk approach your “personal” space.
One rule of shamanizing animism is that the animal, bug or bird must look you “straight in the eyes” and make eye contact, this is a soul to soul connection and the only one you should concern yourself with in the beginning, they are not trying to save our life or tell us some giant heavenly bird tribe message (angels), they are just wanting you to pay attention to mother earth and her natural world, in which they belong, they also want you to understand that you have more than one soul and that they have arrived, thats all, and this is so important to remember.
I encouraged you to start reading about spider totem when one shows actually up, yes, that is an important level and stage of growth, those who are completed with that stage, the next connection to move further allows you to bring the totem home for dinner (nourishment of your soul) into your personal life. If a bird or spider does not look in your eyes, when you start paying attention, then there is no reason to waste your time with this totem. If it flies into your car window, then you have missed every past opportunity to connect, and they have shown up in a drastic effort. Eventually they will give up on the person who doesn’t get.
I remember one time I drove the same stretch of highway and 3 hawks, everyday, sat in the same place of the 30 mile drive… for seven years. One snow storm I was driving and one was dead on the road, I was devastated, but my life was falling apart from choosing a divorce, and it took me seven years to make sure it was the truth, the hawks waited patiently for me to make that final move, they were some difficult choices I had to make. I turned around and went to the exact point where the dead hawk was, and there was no hawk, and the 3 hawks were never there again, my life changed and I began to have intense mystical experiences after that. Death of animals, avian etc. in totem work is more complicated and maybe I will write an article on that in the future.
Animals, bugs, oceanids, they all give us a part of their life for you in soul communication, when you decide to interact with them in a shamanistic way, as well as meat or fur for warmth. Spider is an older and more archaic and complicated wise one, and deeper than the writings and categories or fashions that others try to fit her into, like the ‘lists’ of spider totem or random writing that goes on and on without experience to make it very clear her roll in our lives. Spider is first and foremost, a bug clan, so she works in the realms of the Fae & Fairy clan people, just as bee and wasp do.
I don’t write totems about things I don’t have experience at, why would I, its not respectful to nature or myself or to first to the black, yellow, red, white and brown peoples traditions of spirituality and shamanism. So use common sense when an animal or spider keeps appearing in your life. After many decades and even as a life of a shaman animist I still learn more and more about my natural relationship of my soul with the soul of the natural world, its an expansive consciousness that opens up more as you expand, and that requires working with teachers and especially healers, like energy work.
One thing to remember is all soul, be them avian, bird, bug or shamans like me who have all our souls and know which one is which, we all move with the rhythms of the moon cultures, those who have done years of buddhism or zen, to shut down the mind, knows what happen when they reach the zero point, the expansion begins, well that is still mind body and what is beginning to expand is our multi layer soul who can travel beyond physical things, it can leave our body at death or part of it leaves when we fall asleep, so too with animals and bees and bugs. Another phase, besides understanding totems or mythology or dreams and day dreams, is to go to sacred circles, goddess circles, sweat lodge circles with oral traditions of storytelling.
To completed this article, if you are a creative person, or need creativity to enhance your life, an artist, a dancer, a writer, try to respect mother earth, and actually dedicate decade or two of experiences with the animal or a bug clan that keeps appearing to you, to deepen your root self with the root of the earth, not a side hobby that lasts a few years or a book deal or an ego boosting dance for attention, but to take your spiritual path seriously, because someday if something dangerous is lingering around you and spider appears, you know exactly what to do from lots practice and paying attention to her, both karma and light.
Be very diligent in your self-healing path, it not only pays off and brings you into healthier circles of healthier mirrors in your life, but also teaches you discernment and that both the shadow self and the light self have an important interplay to heal the emotional soul issues in your life, seeing one without the other only continues struggle, regret or repeating emotional issues.
Respect the Spider, this ancient weaver, who has been around a few million years and when we reincarnate, she shows up again to say – are you ready this lifetime to take my messages more seriously of your real living life or do I have to wait another lifetime.